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May 17 2018

One Woman’s Road to Self-Confidence

Laura Gubb, Dating Photographer shares her Road to Self Confidence.

Laura Gubb

I was and I still am the quiet type, most of the time. A day dreamer and a story teller back in my early days, I never imagined life will happen to me so intensely and that it will be a journey far beyond what my imagination could deliver. As the saying goes, reality can exceed fantasy. And it’s all about the many little decisions and the handful of big ones that you make and the courage to make them.

Doing It Backwards

I got married at the age of 19. Legalizing my relationship at such young age had more to do with moving to another country and the need to feel some kind of security, rather than the desire to play house. Under these circumstances my husband indavertently became my big brother, my father, my lover, my everything. Our years together were both wonderful and extreme due to him liking to take risks and thus getting us into situations where we didn’t know what tomorrow will bring. Instead of the feeling of security, most of the time I felt very stressed and insecure about our future. Whilst we did wondrous things together, one of them being a work and residency permit consultany firm for foreigners just like us and whilst life with him helped me grow in ways I have never imagined, his overwhelming personality would at the same time inhibit me to the point where I didn’t know who I was anymore. After over a decade of marriage, I came to the point where I refused to be a spectator and a collaborator to his way of life. I had to find my own path and discover what I wanted from life.

Why Modelling?

I always loved having my photo taken. I also felt passionate about fashion design. All through my twenties I longingly followed famous models’ carreers wishing to be able to do the same. As the years passed I have believed less and less that I had a shot at any kind of modelling. I did take up drawing though, in view of possibly studying fashion design. In the meantime something life shattering started happening. My husband and I drifted apart and shortly after we separated. It was a long drawn out process, that left us both confused and hurting. I moved out, although we still worked together. The amazing thing we managed to do, although not without conflict, was to remain on friendly terms.

My newly found freedom did wonders to my self confidence. I started having a stronger sense of self. My posture and my vibe had changed. And the unthinkable happened. I was stopped on the street by a photographer who asked me if I ever considered modelling. I was 30 years old. And yet I took it in my stride to make modelling happen.

My first 2 years were not much more than getting a feel for the business and spending on photo shoots, composite cards, registering with agencies and doing more photo shoots, till I was approached, yet again by another photographer, who needed a model for his creative photo project. That was my first paid job as a model. That job gave me the confidence to carry on. What followed was years of hard work and creative adventure. I constantly put myself out there, built my own website, registered with more agencies, did time for prints photo shoots and the jobs kept coming. For years I had two jobs, modelling and an admin job as well. When people asked what I did in my spare time, I would tell them, modelling. That was my “going out” most of the time. I loved it.

From Model to Dating Photographer

Once I moved on from modelling, after more than 7 years, my chances of meeting new people diminished considerably. That’s when I decided to try online dating. What struck me straight away was the poor quality of most members’ photos and profiles. There was so little to go on. I realised that there were thousands of people out there struggling to present themselves and thus loosing out.

The experience inspired me to build a service that offers profile editing and writing as well as photo editing.  Doing the actual photo shoots was a small leap from there. With my extensive background in photo modelling and my experience as a hobby photographer, all I needed was to polish my style and aim for high quality.

In the meantime, my husband and I reunited after a decade and a half apart. Both older and wiser we have learned from our past mistakes and were ready for a new beginning.

I currently run mydatingphotos.com and I’m now building a new website called mylinkedinphotos.com, because professionals deserve good photos too.

It’s been a long journey but I cherish every minute of it. When you have the courage to confront your fears and take the road less travelled, you realise that your confidence is your most valuable travel companion and it’s your business card too.

Written by Fiona Wrighton · Read more blogs about: Career, Gender Balance · Or: Confidence, dating, laura gubb, photographer, relationships

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